Honestly, I am confused. Sometimes when I see an old friend, I realize, people can change, and at other times, another person I know from the past reminds me it is all a myth. So what exactly is the conclusion? Can people actually change? Well, here’s what I think.
People can change, but it does not happen overnight. You can’t just wake up one day realizing that you have left behind the old you. Also, I personally believe a person can’t change his/her personality. Deep down we all know what is wrong with us, too emotional, too stressed, too naïve, or too pessimistic. However, even after knowing this, it is hard to change traits of your personality. You can’t help but keep jumping back to old ways.
That being said, even changing a few aspects of your personality takes a lot of time, patience, and perseverance. One day you can decide not to be pessimistic about everything, but the moment things start going wrong, you start assuming the worst. And I don’t feel this is somebody’s fault, or you don’t want to change, it is just that you can’t let go of habits and traits you have harbored for years.
I am a person who deals with stress and anxiety 24 hours in a day. I lose a client, I get stressed. I receive a bad review, I get stressed. And everything else you can imagine. Stress and anxiety are now a part of me, and I am trying to change that for a few years now. It is safe to say, even I think I have progressed just a little. If earlier my level of anxiety was 8, it is 7 now, which is really slow progress, given the fact I am trying to change that for 2-3 years now.
Another personal example is I like things in my order. It is not about keeping my space clean, but I like to keep things in order. So, if that order is changed, I go from zero to ten anxiety in milliseconds. Needless to say, I have been trying to change that as well. I asked my sister to deliberately spoil my room’s order and push me not to put things back immediately. I have really changed in this manner, now it bothers me if the order of my things is changed, but I can control the urge to put things back in place instantly.
Hence, if you look at both the instances, it is evident that you can change some things about yourself, but it takes time. A lot of time, for that matter.
However, not to forget, we always stay the same deep down, we may learn how to subside these certain things about ourselves, but it is always there in the back of our head.